I haven’t written a blog in so long… I’ve been distracted by life. Last year my focus was stability. This year I’d like to declare my new focus on balance. I love doing things my way, not saying that my way is always the right way. I’m not closed minded to other ideas and theories on the ways of life but I think I’ve pretty much figured out (for the most part) what makes me happy, what doesn’t, and what motivates me to be a better person. There’s just one problem that I continue to have with myself. I’m a very selfish person, always been that way and never cared how it effected me or others. Part of it’s my problem and the rest I blame everyone else around me for taking my shit.
Yesterday I woke up to bullshit. That happens sometimes, especially when you sleep in the bed with your phone. An opportunity approached me that could make my life so much easier than how hard it’s about to become. Me turning back into my selfish ways considered taking the easy way out versus just taking this new situation and counting it as one of Gods many blessings that have come and will continue to come my way. We had a talk, you know, God and I, and after crying and praying and thinking, I realized that this was my perfect opportunity to take this blessing and make it something life changing. He reminded me of how strong, how driven, how smart I was and how I should never let another persons demons get me down. It’s not my fault if others around me don’t know what they want out of life. I can’t beat myself up for trying to fulfill another persons needs/wants. I will continue to fight in this life of sin fighting for what I want. Fighting for what makes me happy and that’s not called selfishness it’s called self love. God knows my wants, my needs, what makes me as well as what breaks me. He will never let me fall. He will never let me fail! So with that being said, IM GOOD. Lol